Week Nine: Part A

Week Nine: Part A

The Farting Frenzy: And Then It Happened


One day, it happened. The apocalypse. It was on the news December 25th, a Christmas surprise! At least that’s what the news said at first; they thought they were revolutionary bringing the dead back to life. Those idiots. They thought they were heroes but they were killers. They developed a zombie virus; not the elixir of life, and they did it with purpose. They did it so they could sell vaccines, vaccines that didn’t work. But they never got to sell them because there was no one dumb enough left to buy them.


 I sat there sharpening a stick hearing the screams I heard ten years ago when this all started but I knew there was no time for that. The only way to survive was to fight I thought and it was the truth. I stood up and stabbed the stick into the ground. We had six people and we all fought.


Abbey, Cole and I were leaving camp to get food, three of us stayed behind and protected camp.


“Come on we’ve got to go starving is not an option.” Said Abbey sternly. I quickly replied “ I’m just getting the map, one second” .

We had a map where we marked everything (food, shelter, gas stations, safe water and potential places to find weapons and medical supplies) we recently found a no frills.


“We have to drive to there it is an hour walk, we don’t want to waste energy especially with no food.” Cole said.


We drove our car there but that was still risky because it was loud and zombies are attracted to noise. We got out of the car and walked in the store it seemed empty but we can never be sure.

“I will stay outside and search the area for ammo,” said Abbey, “We are running low on it, if I find anything interesting i’ll tell you.”


We went to the dry goods and cans aisle, on guard at all time we took as much as our bags could carry. Cole was grabbing a can of beans when a hand came out and grabbed him. He stabbed his knife  through the shelf and it stabbed the zombie in the head. After that we knew that there would be more.


 And then it happened. I farted and it was loud. The zombies came out of nowhere. I had my crossbow in hand, shooting heads and killing. We fought and fought but there was so many. I was bitten it was the end for me.


I woke up, really this never happened I was dreaming a horrible dream. I was asleep for so long…I will never eat beans before bed again.

Sacred Fart Activity Centre